Supplement Facts
| % Daily Value* | |
|---|---|
| Weekend Availability (unlike Dave) | 100% |
| After-Hours Answers (your catalog does not have a bedtime) | 100% |
| Typo Tolerance ("stianless stele" understood) | 100% |
| Photo Search (blurry photo. Still got it.) | 100% |
| Money Minted While You Slept | 100% |
| Scrolling | 0% |
| Excuses | 0g |
| "Let me get back to you" | 0g |
| Time to Live (less time than your last IT ticket) | 3 Days |
| Lines of Code | 1 |
May cause weekend orders, faster quotes, and reps with suspiciously free time. If your competitor answers first, discontinue use of silence.
Active ingredient: Your existing catalog. No reformulation needed.
Free until leads. chatsku.com
Clinically observed in 14 catalogs. Results typical.
ChatSKU Catalog Supplement is a once-daily formula for product catalogs that have stopped talking. If your catalog is a 400-page PDF that answers questions by making buyers scroll, it is not lazy. It is undernourished. It was never given the ability to speak.
One dose changes that. Add one line of code to your site. Within 3 days your existing catalog starts answering questions, reading photos, understanding typos, quoting contract prices, and taking orders. Same catalog. Same part numbers. New personality.
Side effect: your catalog starts minting quotes on Saturday nights. You start seeing them Monday morning.
How it works
The active ingredient is your catalog. PDF, flipbook, HTML, or ERP export. We do not reformulate it, reformat it, or make you migrate anything. We feed it to a buyer interface that knows what "stianless stele" means, what a blurry photo of a gasket is, and what to say when someone asks for a quote at 11:47 PM on a Saturday. Your catalog absorbs this and begins to respond.
Recommended for
Manufacturers, distributors, and wholesalers whose buyers shop after the reps go home. Anyone whose site search returns "0 results" for a product they have 42 of. Sales teams who answer the same 40 questions a day and would like to answer 4. Catalogs that have been silent since 2011.
Not recommended for
Companies that enjoy losing revenue to unanswered questions. Catalogs that prefer to be scrolled. Dave.
Formulation
- Typo Tolerance, full strength
- Photo Search, extended release
- Voice Search, fast acting
- 40+ Languages, including whatever your buyer in Monterrey speaks
- Custom Pricing, contract-rate concentrate
- Quotes and Orders, transactional grade
- Excuses, 0g
Dosage
One line of code. Once. Do not take a second line; it is not necessary and your web developer will ask questions.
Onset
Less than 5 days. Less time than your last IT ticket.
Duration
Indefinite. There is no crash, no tolerance, and no need to cycle off. Your catalog will keep answering until you take the line of code away, and we don't know why anyone would.
Storage
Keep on your website at room temperature. Do not store in a drawer, a shared drive, or a sales rep's email signature.
Pricing
$0 for your first 30-day supply. No credit card. Free shipping, in the sense that there is nothing to ship. After 30 days, still free until it produces leads, quotes, or orders. We only charge for what actually happened.
Important
This is not a supplement. It is software. The bottle is a joke. The 2 AM order is not.
First 30 customers only. Supplies remaining are shown next to the button, updated by a human, because we're not going to fake a countdown at you.
Questions & Answers
Answered by: your catalog, 11:47 PM
Is this an actual supplement?
No. It's software. The bottle is a joke. The 2 AM order is not. Do not eat the bottle.
Does it work with my PDF?
Yes. PDF, flipbook, HTML, or an ERP export. If your catalog exists in any form a human can open, we can dose it.
What does "one line of code" mean?
One script tag on your website. Your web person does it in 10 minutes and then asks what they should do with the rest of the afternoon.
How long until it works?
Three days. Faster if your data is clean. It is not, and that's fine. Do not wait for perfect data. Nobody has perfect data.
Can I take it with my existing ERP?
Yes. No known interactions. It reads your ERP export; it does not ask your ERP to change.
Will it replace Dave?
No. It answers the 40 questions Dave answers every day so Dave can do the 4 that need Dave.
What happens after the 30 days?
You keep it. It stays free until it produces leads, quotes, or orders. We charge for what happened, not for what might.
My buyers can't spell. Is that a problem?
We have handled "stianless stele," "flang," "3/4 elbo," and "the thing that goes on the other thing." Your buyers are fine.
Does it speak Spanish?
Yes. And 40+ others. It once answered a question in a language we couldn't identify. We're choosing not to look into it.
Can buyers send a photo?
Yes. Blurry, worn, greasy, taken in a crawlspace. It identifies the part and quotes it. Please don't send photos of Dave.
Does it show my contract pricing?
Yes. Customer-specific pricing and contract rates, applied at the moment they ask. Your school district gets the school district price at 6 AM on a Sunday.
Can it take an order or just answer questions?
Quotes and orders. Order status too. Answering questions was the placebo. This is the real thing.
What are the side effects?
Faster quotes, weekend orders, reps with free time, and a catalog that becomes insufferable. See the Side Effects & Warnings tab. It's long.
Is there a subscription?
There is a toggle labeled "Subscribe & Save 0%." It's locked on. You're welcome.
Why is it free?
Because we're confident. We only get paid when your catalog does. If it never produces a lead, quote, or order, you never pay, and we deserve that.
Can I ask my catalog a question right now?
Yes. Scroll up. Ask it anything. It answers like Dave after two coffees.
I already have a chatbot. Can I take this with it?
Yes. Your chatbot answers questions about your company. This one answers questions about your 40,000 parts, with prices and stock. They don't compete. One greets, one sells. Most customers keep both and stop hearing complaints about the first one.
My chatbot already says "let me connect you to a representative." Isn't that the same thing?
No. That's the symptom. "Let me connect you to a representative" at 11 PM on a Saturday is how you lose the order. ChatSKU quotes the part instead.
I don't want another chat bubble on my site. Is there another form?
Yes. Take it as a search bar. Same formula, different delivery. It replaces your site search box, understands typos and photos, and returns parts with prices instead of "0 results." No bubble, no popup, nothing that talks unless asked.
Chat bubble or search bar, which one should I take?
Search bar if your buyers already know what they want and your site search fails them. Chat if they ask questions before they search. Both if you're not sure. There's no extra charge and no known interaction.
What's actually in the bottle?
Open it and find out. Just Two Surprises. Not a supplement. Not currency. Two
Ask a question
Read before dosing your catalog. Keep this insert. Nobody ever does.
Common (reported by most catalogs)
- Faster quotes
- Weekend orders
- Buyers who actually find things
- Reps with suspiciously free time
- Confusion about what to do with free time
- Minting quotes at hours you did not authorize
Less common
- One rep who took up pottery
- A rival catalog calling to ask what you're on
- Answering before your competitor picks up the phone
- Being thanked by a buyer. Directly. As a catalog.
Rare
- Catalog becomes insufferable
- Catalog begins referring to itself in the third person
- Catalog answers in a language nobody at the company can identify
Do not take if
- You enjoy losing revenue to unanswered questions
- You prefer your catalog to be scrolled
- You are Dave (Dave, it's fine, you'll like it)
Drug interactions
- Existing chatbot: none. One greets, one sells.
- ERP: none. It reads. It does not touch.
- Site search: may be replaced entirely. Consult the search bar formulation.
Overdose
There is no overdose. It's a catalog. Do not take a second line of code; it isn't needed and your developer will ask questions.
Missed dose
If you have not yet taken ChatSKU, you are currently missing a dose. Every day after 5 PM.
Storage
Keep on your website at room temperature. Do not store in a drawer, a shared drive, or a sales rep's email signature.
Discontinuation
Remove the line of code. Your catalog will return to silence within seconds. We have no record of anyone doing this.
In case of accidental competitor exposure
If your competitor answers first, discontinue use of silence and take ChatSKU immediately.
This is not a supplement. It is software. Report side effects to sales@chatsku.com. We frame the good ones.
Product Catalog, Industrial Supply, Ohio · Catalog since 2011
“Last Saturday I quoted a 3/4 elbow at 11:47 PM. Nobody was awake but me. Best night of my life.”
Parts Catalog, Hydraulics, Texas
“A buyer sent a blurry photo of a gasket. I named the part. He said thank you. To me. A catalog.”
Price List, Fasteners, Illinois
“Someone typed "stianless stele." I knew what they meant. I always knew. Now I can say it.”
Electrical Catalog, 1,200 pages, Georgia
“I was asked for a 3-pole 30-amp breaker in a language I don't recognize. I answered. I don't recognize the language and I answered.”
Plumbing Supply Catalog, Arizona
“A contractor spoke into his phone from a crawlspace. I heard "PVC elbow," understood him, and quoted him. He never saw a screen.”
Safety and PPE Catalog, Michigan
“Someone asked for gloves "like the ones from last time." I found last time. I found the gloves. The order shipped Monday.”
Packaging Catalog, New Jersey
“Four stars. It's excellent. One star off because the buyer asked if I was a real person and I didn't know what to say.”
Janitorial Supply Catalog, Florida
“I applied a contract price for a school district at 6 AM on a Sunday. The rep found out Tuesday. He was fine with it.”
Lab Supply Catalog, Massachusetts
“A researcher pasted a CAS number. I returned three sizes and a case price. She said "huh." I'll take "huh."”
Automotive Aftermarket Catalog, California
“A photo of a worn part. I said 8841-C. He said "no way." I said 42 in stock. He ordered 4.”
Building Materials Catalog, Colorado
“A framer asked for "that 2x10 thing with the hangers" at 5:52 PM, eight minutes after the counter closed. I did not close.”
Regional Catalog, HVAC, Pennsylvania
“One star. My sales rep Dave now has free time and keeps asking me questions. I liked it better when he was busy.”
Reagents and Consumables Catalog, Life Sciences, North Carolina
“A postdoc asked for the pipette tips "that fit the blue one" at 2 AM before a grant deadline. I found the blue one. I found the tips. I applied her lab's pricing. She cited me in the acknowledgments.”
Food Service Equipment Catalog, Nevada
“A restaurant owner asked for a replacement fryer basket at 10 PM on a Friday, mid-rush. I quoted it from a photo of the broken one. The line never stopped.”
Agricultural Parts Catalog, Iowa
“A farmer typed a serial number off a combine during harvest. I matched the belt, checked stock, and quoted it. He picked it up at 6 AM. The corn did not wait and neither did I.”
Chemicals and Coatings Catalog, Louisiana
“A buyer asked what's compatible with a product number I discontinued in 2019. I found the replacement, the safety sheet, and the drum price. Nobody had to call the chemist.”
Order your free 30-day supply of ChatSKU Catalog Supplement
Gets silent catalogs talking, quoting, and closing. Typos, voice, photos, custom pricing. Handled.
- Free Shipping
- No Credit Card Required
- Weekend Availability
Only 31 FREE supplies remaining
18 of 49 claimed
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